Saturday, April 24, 2010

contemplate. words.

salam muhibbah

praise to Allah for the love exists in every corner in the world

you met me
Why did you treat me special?
you greet me
Why must you got to know me?
you are my team mate
Why did i feel you are my soul mate?
I am from Muar
Why is your hometown the same place?
New Zealand is my dreamland
Why did you tell me its yours, too?
I hate to feel important to you
Why on earth you ever told me your other side of life
thus made me feel significant to be someone in the know?
I prefer a vacation in forest than beach
Why did you say you love forest and its greenery scene?
I rejected the Malaysia licensing system
and acquiring one in Acheh only takes a blink of an eye
Why did you offer to send me there?
and made me believe that you truly will
I like to let other win when I talk to them
Why do you always nod with a smile with my arguments?

I grin secretly everytime the thought of you emerges
But try not to look dyingly-happy when I see your face
I act like I do not care enough
But my instinct keeps telling
Ignorance will put me at loss of your love

I hope you treat everyone special
I pray my instinct fools me
I wish I could find many people who pick New Zealand to go to

So you are no longer somebody in my heart
So I no longer think I am somebody to you
So we can just stay as friends
Talk as friends ought to
Think as friends should
Believe as friends would
No more and no less

There is one first love i need to look for
Pledge for
Work for
Love to HIM

p/s: Lord,prithee, Show me what's mine.

Monday, April 5, 2010

every. words.

Salam syukr.
Say your abundant thanks to the Ever- giving Lord. Hamdalah.

Every You, every i.
You give me air,
To breathe Your names in my every breath.

Every You, every i,
You give me energy,
To be zealous to serve You in my every action.

Every You, every i,
You give me hardships,
To test my love and faith as your vicegerent.

Every You, every i,
You grant my prayers,
To evaluate my gratefulness to your gifts.

You then,
Are Lord the Exalted.
You, too,
Are Lord the Giver of Honour and Giver of Dishonour.
Also, You,
Are the Incomparable.

Then do,
guide me, show me, hold me...
To Your door of compassion.
So that I could hold on come whatever may between us
Shall i compare Thou: thee Utmost Love?

Memorize meaningfully, Practice Daily, Love Unconditionally.

Wednesday, March 31, 2010

dilemma. words.

New Milieu of Semester Three

" Registration Courses for semester 2010/2011 is NOW OPENED from 29 Apr- 16 Apr 2010. Please bla,bla,bla... ".
Sai~ (eh?)

Salam ukhuwah abadan abada.

Allright. So that is particularly of what is printed on several number of banners in Campus Sec 17, and also in Main Camp I assume. So, time to choose, select, pick, take...

I wasn't looking forward to this part of decision- making, despite the fact that I eagerly would like to finish another three lengthy- short years as a Teslian. Decisions are to be made on:

1. Minor subject:
Counseling or Literature?
Whoa... Literature has never failed to keep me amused. However, I'm a total morone when it comes to creative writing and thinking. I am not fond of looking at stories or novels or poems or phrases beyond the beyond. In short words, I usually go on the blink when it comes to analysing and interpreting. I am a person who enjoy reading the most. Of course, what else is more tranquilizing than to sit by yourself devouring over beautifully, poetically, humouringly arranged words in reading materials? But that's it. I'm no good to understand the author' s feelings. I've no notion to dive into the writer's cognitive facet. Which is why Counseling has become a better choice for me. A straight- forward thinker with no effort to think critically about whatever the author of books think about. To highly- encouraging friends which couldn't be found elsewhere: THANK YOU FOR THE NEVER-ENDING SUPPORT.
Nevertheless, I do expect for counseling to not to be as appealing as lit(I've done sum simple skimmin' and scannin' in the libry on lit textbooks), but hey, come what may:
I'm gonna make it thru.:DDDD
< Yup, this is what I'm gonna work on!

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

certain. words.

Salam masrur.

Since English for Young Muslim(EfYM), a lot of subtle yet appealing train of events emerged into my life(i rather accept it that way).

Amazing things
The EfYM programme is conducted mainly by two amazing married couple, Coach Ridz and Coach Sha. They indeed are Muslims adult who knows what is needed to be done to help our youths and kids-- master the universal language: ENGLISH! The effort and energy actively linger around you when you work with them. Amazing man- Amazing job.

Surprising thing
When I join a programme or campaign etc., I expect to gain something beneficial to learn about or somebody to know. Knowledge acquired from the programme: ABUNDANT. People met at the programme:surprising. There was a party of people who are. . . lost in their journey, but at the same time amazingly enjoying it pretty much. When I say lost, I'm referring to the social setting, not neither place nor time wise.
To me, it was not merely shocking, but disheartening as well. Girlfriends, lets pray for a better future of the world-- OUR world. Amin. After all, a prayer is mukmin's mightiest weapon, is it not?

Emotional thing
I hate complex emotions. I fear vague feelings. I dislike hatred and jealousy. I avoid utter fondness to a particular person. But at the end of the day, I found myself wrestling and struggling to breath in the middle of a plethora of these feelings I never wished to deal with. Eottoke? I am not a freak who is determined to live this life without a company. Surely I cannot deny I hope to find my Mr. Right, but not in the nearest moment in time. It is not arrogance or superiority that I want to declare when I give a cold shoulder to any relationship proposals. I dare not say much, but I've come to a point where none of this occurences signify significance to my feelings or my daily events.

This time around, I decide to let things go. Looks like its simple to just follow the flow.
Hey, it rythms.

Sunday, March 7, 2010

gratitude. words.

Salam rahmat.

I was facing difficulties completing my project on Literature subject when I decided on turning to ask my former English teacher for a favour. She replied my e- mail in no time and I felt ashamed of myself.

I adored her as a student to her teacher. However, I did not tell her when I attended Asasi TESL course. I kept myself silent until a task came up-- which is to interview HER. So, I told her about my progress in Asasi programme and she responded gladly with my interview uqestions and declared that she was more than willing to help me on any later date.

I felt guilty for not telling her, AGAIN, that I have proceeded my TESL course on Degree level. As fated, another task( the Lit project)came up ,acquiring me to refer to her. It was only then that I know she is no longer teaching in my former secondary school. Surprisingly expected, she answered me in a warm attitude( though we merely did it thru messages I can inspect the warmth). Once more, she became the saviour of her student who apparently approved her existence in time of needs.
I am aware that my attitude is far from a speck sense of respect towards my teacher.
I realized that to seek for her aid only during my bad times is appaling.
But I never, ever meant to be insolent by not telling her.

Pardona me Teacher Faridahanna,
You always are the teacher in my heart.

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

perplexed. words.

Salam muhibah.

It is puzzling when someone says 'I don't enjoy being alone', yet act the exact opposite of what they declare. If you do not want people to engage deeply in your life affairs, I can comprehend that without any problem. Neither I dislike whatever inteference or disturbance into my life. HOWEVER, there are differences which distinguish people who disturb you AND people who assist you-- in this context it refers to a group of people in your life called friends.

There will be times when I feel disrupted by my friends. But then I have my second thought: my friends never mean any harm by asking about where I am going, what I am doing or going to do, when I am going, with whom etc. It shows that THEY CARE. People care about you on the account that THEY LOVE you. That's when you start sharing and start giving without hoping for anything in return. Should anything happen to me, I have my friends to support me physically, figuratively, economically(LOL), and emotionally. It is by de facto that we always have our benevolent God to be on our side, whether or not we realize it. And in my opinion, friends are angels sent by God Himself. Well, apart from 'not-so-innocent' character, they are angels to me alright.

To Ema, Iman, Myra, Dya, Fana, Ku Azrie and others unmentioned:
I need all of you my friends, and I love you, unsparingly.

Mind you,

Though flowers wither,
Our friendship shall never.

Sunday, February 21, 2010

rush. words.


Time's always jealous of me. Or is it only me who'll never get enough of it? Tests, assignments, projects, dates(huhu), events, etc. Most of the times they are exhaustive, yet at the end of the day, behind each and every single occasion which took place lies meaningful lessons. Sometimes the lessons are learnt the bitter way. Nevertheless, its the lesson which values most.

For instance:

Case 1>I lost my ptop ACER Aspire 4530.
Cause> A robber broke into my newly- rented house and got away with it.
Date> A couple of weeks ago.
Time> Around 10 am- 2 pm. Thank God we were not in.
Action> Made a police report with Ema in Police Station Sec 11 and 15.
Action by policeman>None.
Transport> Taxi!!

Case 2> Gas tank in the kitchen stolen.
Cause> The same robber( Each members of the house thinks so) made his way for the second
Date> Last week.
Time> Before Wed. Ema went back with her helpful family for a check and found out about the
second unfortunate event.
Further action> Robbery reported, again.
Further action by policemen> None, again.
Last action> Made a move into a new much secure, more spacious, bigger, cleaner, cooler( i
mean the air circulation inside the house), etc.

Lessons :

Case 1> Nothing is for eternity and nothing's mine. Everything I have is borrowed. Should i be
careless on my "borrowed" properties, they could be taken away anytime, anywhere,
Hikmah> I'll be getting a brand new shiny laptop. Sooner or later.Huhuhu:P

Case 2> An event may not be as catastrophic as it seems. Eventhough we laboured quite a sum
money to settle down in the new place, we all believe its worth it. Our parents are way
satisfied with the new living place. In short words: the tassel is worth the hassle.
Hikmah> We are living in a residential area managed by its Rukun Tetangga per se. Well,
the existence of RT makes us assured of our security esp. The landlord is 100 times
better than the previous one. Owh, and the rental payment is still the same.

Every cloud has its silver lining. And hey, Allah is with ALL of US ALL the TIME. As long as you can keep your faith to Him and keep holding on, you will get through. You will when you believe.

Sunday, January 31, 2010


Abundant thanks to dearie Ema by assisting me with my amateur blog. Syukran Jazilan.;DD

Friday, January 29, 2010

advice. words

Salam farhan

Bukan paksaan
Bukan tindakan melulu
Tapi sarat terisi
dengan ilmu

Tidak bermaksud menghukum
Tidak jua menilai secara membuta tuli
Tidak sesekali bermaksud menghina

Kadang- kadang?
Atau tidak pernah?

Ketahuilah.. Ianya
Satu tanggungjawab teragung
Bukan beban
Bukan bebelan
Dari insan yang memberi dakwah

Tapi fahamilah
Dakwah itu
Nasihat tentang kebenaran jua kesabaran
Yang ingin dikongsi
Dengan insan yang
barangkali belum atau kurang mengerti

Mengertilah saudara- saudaraku
Bahawa dakwah itu
Tuntutan atas setiap jiwa
Yang bernafas
atas nama Muslim sejati
atas nama Tuhannya
Yang Maha Menakluk
Setiap hati
Sekiranya Dia mahu
Maka Jadilah

Monday, January 25, 2010

first words. nervous+excited

Salam ukhuwah

There are several direct and indirect purposes which have driven me to begin writing on a blog. Academic purposes to be authentic. I'm hoping for fruitful results! Amin.;D